Charlotte Snoxall (www.charlottesnoxalltherapy.com) and I met whilst training as counsellors in 2003. Having working together at the University of Cambridge for a number of years, we decided to adopt the model of couples therapy where two therapists work with the clients together as a basis for our relationship consultancy. This two-on-two model offers a different dynamic for couples and is generally experienced as extremely helpful. The more intense way of working allows for both clients to feel fully supported, often leads to fewer meetings being required and as a consequence, achieves long-lasting results and change.
Using our experience as both family mediators and relationship consultants, alongside our well-established counselling practices, Charlotte and I offer a bespoke service to couples, whether re-coupling or de-coupling, to help you find a more positive way of honouring your relationship, be that in the past, present or future.
Our passionate belief in helping couples and parents to communicate in ways that respect both parties enables our clients to move on more positively whether together or apart.
Why, how and what about?
We start by arranging to meet with you on an individual basis. This allows us the opportunity to get a really good sense of what you each want to achieve from working with us. It is also very important that we assess if our approach is going to be the most helpful and appropriate way forward. From there, we progress to joint meetings held either during the week or at weekends, depending on your preference and our availability.
Finding regular and frequent time to put aside for addressing the important things in life, such as our relationships, is tough. Many of us have demanding jobs and families to take care of as well. We believe that allocating a half or even a whole day for relationship consultancy can be more practicable and that this way of working intensively means that some real breakthroughs in understanding can be achieved rather than returning to ‘ordinary life’ between sessions when everything can either intentionally or non-intentionally get forgotten.
Face to face meetings generally last for a minimum of a half day but we can discuss options during the initial consultations. However, if we are working online, this needs careful consideration and shorter meetings may be preferable due to potential ‘screen fatigue’. Our unique approach allows us to work in a room together but at times, one on one, when it is deemed to be helpful and more productive. Sometimes couples choose to meet with us for a couple of sessions, others continue for several meetings scheduled over a period of months.
Examples of clients we work with:
Couples who want to commit to one another, whether through marriage or otherwise, who would benefit from a short-course of relationship-focused work to identify potential issues and develop skills to negotiate the inevitable challenges that long-term relationships encounter
Couples who want an ‘MOT’ service, recognising that certain issues keep repeating themselves and remain unsolved, or in anticipation of new challenges such as children, step-children, redundancy, menopause, retirement or long-term illness
Should I stay or should I go?
Couples unsure of whether their relationship remains viable or not who would like to explore what options they have – whether to stay together or to separate
Couples who recognise that their relationship is no longer tenable and want to find the best way forward for their children and themselves upon separation
Negotiating a new relationship
Couples in new relationships, not wanting to encounter the difficulties they might have experienced in their past relationships, but to feel free to move forward in a positive way
Couples who are blending families where ghosts from the past frequently rise and vulnerabilities and defences are omnipresent